Food for Thought

Raawan of the year goes to the President of the U. S. of A.

I now realize that my eating habits are not only hurting my denim’s buttons but my fellow earthlings also. One is a case of The Americans, rest pertains to the women I had been on. The Americans are disturbed the way I eat and how much I eat. Even though a content of my meal doesn’t even match the things they are stuffing themselves with. For instance we use Olive oil for other reasons than the Americans do. I hope you don’t want me to explain it here.

When Mr. George W. Bush included me in his speech it was the most proud moment of my life. I mean the first man of the earth mentioning me in his speech; it’s a great achievement, no? Now somebody would ask that when the heck this Bush guy talked about this Raawan thing. Well he talked about people of Indian Middle Class, I am The Indian middle class, eating up all the resources of the world, ME. Got it.

Prosperity in countries like INDIA is "good" but it triggers increased demand for "better nutrition" which in turn leads to higher food prices, US President George W Bush said.

Mr. Bush was a cheerleader of the Phillips Academy, he is still doing the same thing but now he is a leader who is cheering masses with his misunderestimated speeches. By the way Mr. Bush created the “misunderestimated” word, that’s Raawanism. He is the only person in the world who can originate a word like this because he is the most misunderestimated guy on the planet. Most misunderestimated because the other dude is Rajni Kanth. I can still remember once Mr. Bush said “Humans and fishes can co-exist peacefully.” Basking in the glory of his wisdom he forgot to mention whether he foresee it happening over the water or under. He did not even mention whether we would be able to copulate with the fishes or not. Also I think he should write dialogues for Rajni Kanth. This way a viewer will get two for the price of one. Misunderestimated stunts and misunderestimated dialogues. What a treat…

Another thing Mr. Bush pointed at was that we Indians were always eating less nutritious food, and we are now demanding more nutritious food. Dude I bet my fat behind, that you haven’t been to India or at least you know jack s.it about Indian cuisine. The least we can do is that we can dispatch a Dilli Police-walah for you to have a BIIIIG look at. We Indians are so obese that even food that we eat dread to enter in our bowels. We talk while eating to lessen the noise of the guerrilla warfare happening in our stomachs. Now you know why we have noisy restaurants.

We Indians are having our “better and nutritious food” since America wasn’t even there in existence, and this dude is telling the world that we are now prosperous enough to demand better and nutritious food. Might I say GROW UP. For Americans I think good and nutritious food means a Double Chicken Burger at McDonald's of course with a Diet coke, but for us its Butter Roti and Butter Chicken with Lassi. I wish I could serve him with that. He would skip his three meals in a row, right after eating this nutritious diet.

Well Indians are always blamed for one thing or the other, but this certainly is the best one coming from the leading man of the planet. The next thing we know is we are blamed for a chimpanzee slapping Mr. Bush for looking like him (the chimpanzee). Hats off to his creative team for such a brilliant idea to make Americans look like an idiot, that too, again… Anyways, blame us Indians for any crisis but you can never blame us for producing a stupid politician, that’s RAAWANISM…

Chow for now

Raawanistically yours

Chota Raawan